this post was submitted on 27 Aug 2026
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I hate to break it to you, but those kernels would stew in your juices for at least a couple days before you got to be cremated, and they'd be all soft and mushy and would not pop.
So you spent your dying moments force-feeding yourself unpopped popcorn for nothing
But I died with a smirk.
Swallow condoms filled with unpopped popcorn
That's gross. I love it
That or the other way you could put a condom full of something in you ;)
I mean surgically, to be clear.