this post was submitted on 25 Jul 2026
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proceeds to call company lawyers
Hey sp3ctr4l, Please sit down. I have some difficult news to share. Unfortunately the company has decided to end your employment effective today. You will get your record of employment by email and enclosed is your package. Please sign and return as soon as possible.
Security will escort you out.
Bye.
proceeds to add sp3ctr4l onto the unsuitable candidates list
[Auto-Reply]:
Hey, appreciate the message, I'm currently on vacation.
I'll respond as soon as I return to work!
has security pack your office
has IT block sp3ctr4l from laptop, email, accounts, key fobs, other accounts, etc
I will wait patiently for your return.
Message Undelivered
[unfortunately, there is no real direct way to form an email that conveys the concept of no futher reply]
[like some kind of gh0st, sp3ct3r, ph4nt4sm...]