this post was submitted on 24 Aug 2026
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HAhahaha, oh my god - you can't have it both ways buddy, you can't claim you didn't read it and respond to sections from it. dIdNt ReAd ThIs OnE eItHeR lmao sure, yeah, everyone believes you.
This is just too much, yes of course you're being performative, not only is nobody actually as dumb as you're pretending to be, you're so desperate you're even falling back on the emoji trope to signal how superior you are. Forget reddit, you ain't got game fit for -facebook-
SEE!!!!
Oh.
Oh dude.
I thought it would be an accessibility tool for you, maybe level the playing cornfield, but... oh this is not good. And you're so proud of it.
Here, this is a pity meme that's more on your level.
What we'll do is, you can pretend I actually posted this, and then you can yell at it or post another meme or just sorta stand there and drool, whatever you want. And then after that I'll make a nice big show of what a great job you did besting my cunning meme, just so all the other kids will think you're cool, and then we'll just all go by Dairy Queen on the way home.
Pity meme:
OH BUDDY, WELL DONE! You sure got me with that one! Man, that was so impressive, I don't think anyone could have done better! Wow that was good, you're AMAZING! Your dad will be so proud when we tell him!
My dad's dead.
Anyway. I think I'm done wasting your time. Good day. Good luck with... Whatever it is that you do.
You're kinda dumb and full of yourself but I honestly do wish you the best.
🫡
YOU DID SO GREAT! And look, all the other kids SAW you! Man, they'll totally forget about you not knowing what a strawman is now. And I'm sure once your dad gets back from that big ol' bunny farm upstate, he's gonna tell you the exact same thing!
I'm just so proud kiddo. Now, do you want a blizzard, or one of those seasonal Dilly-bars with the cheesecake crumbles?
...
(Nah but seriously, you sure you're not gonna stick around? I mean I know, this is kinda an endgame move, I can keep up the supportive sarcasm as a valid retort to literally anything you might say. But this has been like shooting fish in a rhetorical barrel for me... could I pay you to stick around...? Seriously, we're all gonna miss you, your fun nebraska facts and that characteristic spunkily stubborn refusal to accept reality. Like one of those WWII movies, where the british guy loses all his squadmates and then tries to take down a tank with a grenade, only to get splattered instantly when he moves out of his foxhole. It was a useless effort, he was hilariously doomed from the start, but with the right theme song you get a little teary at his determination to fight to the inevitable end)